Hold onto your binoculars, folks, because the Carol Burnett sketch, “Brown Derby,” is about to embark on a celebrity stalking adventure with the infamous duo, Bitzy Bitzy Rita (Vicki Lawrence) and her mom (Carol Burnett). These ladies are on a mission to spot some A-listers at the Brown Derby restaurant, and nothing will stand in their way!
As they enter the restaurant, they are greeted by the quick-witted hotel manager, Cloud (Lyle Waggoner), who hilariously suggests they hit up the Taco Bell next door instead. But Bitzy and her mom are determined to spot some stars, so Cloud reluctantly shows them to their table.
Bitzy instantly takes out her binoculars and scans the restaurant for any sign of celebrities. She excitedly announces that she sees Jack Benny, John Corvin, and Doris Day. Her mom asks if they’re sitting at the same table. However, Bitzy clarifies, “All on the same wall!” leading to some laughs.
But just as the ladies are about to give up hope, in walks the legendary Rita Hayworth (portraying herself) with her agent, Bernie Cornie (Harvey Korman). Cloud welcomes them with open arms, and Bitzy and her mom are happy & excited.
Bitzy’s mom wastes no time barging over to Rita’s table and eavesdropping on their conversation. She interrupts to give her unwanted opinion that playing a brain surgeon isn’t suitable for Rita. Bernie is annoyed and asks her to buzz off, but Bitzy’s mom persists.
Bitzy’s mom even asks for an autograph, pretending it’s her first time getting an autograph. Even though her book is chock-full of signatures from other celebrities. The stalker even admits to breaking into Barbara Stanwyck’s house for her autograph – talk about dedication!
Despite Bernie’s protests, Rita agrees to give the autograph. But even after Bitzy’s mom gets what she wants, she won’t leave the poor actress alone. She keeps interrupting and bothering her until Bernie finally asks her to go again. But just as they’re about to leave, Bitzy’s mom suddenly decides to help Bernie call the waiter over for the menu.
It gets even better! Bitzy and her mom decide to move their table right next to Rita’s and strike up a conversation. The proud mom brags about her daughter, Bitzy being a cheerleader and even asks her to show off some of her moves. She even mimics Rita, which surprisingly impresses the actress.
But then Bitzy’s mom drops the bombshell that she’s never even seen any of Rita’s movies. So before leaving, Bitzy’s mom asks for a picture with Rita, who reluctantly agrees. But as soon as they get the go-ahead, Bitzy takes out her camera and starts filming Rita eating lunch.
Bitzy’s mom even instructs the actress on how to pose and eat, which irritates the actress. The two of them get into a hilarious argument that leaves the audience laughing. Just when the audience thinks that the sketch will end, the restaurant manager, Cloud, tells Rita that someone wants to buy her champagne.
As fate would have it, Rita’s mysterious champagne benefactor turns out to be none other than the legendary Glen Campbell! But Bitzy and her mom are not the ones to miss a chance to film the celebrities. So they keep their cameras rolling as Glen joins Rita.
Bitzy’s mom goes on full-on paparazzi mode, even asking Glen to take a seat so she can capture every moment on film. It’s a hilarious spectacle as the two stalkers continue their stalking escapades, oblivious to the bemused looks of the stars.